Sunday, March 7, 2010


We are fully in the phase with trying to communicate with the girls. When I think about it I realize we've been trying to communicate on some level since birth. When they were first born they cried & we responded with either food, a clean diaper, a blanket, a little rocking and USUALLY something worked. Now I feel like I'm trying to learn a foreign language only there's no handy translating dictionary.

At first when they were starting to babble a few words it was exciting that they could point & speak things like dada, book, backpack, nana, & eventually mimi (=mommy). Now, it's a whole different ball game we're dealing with. They are intentionally trying to express their needs, wants & emotions. And unfortunately it's not as much fun anymore as I stand with a look of confusion, I'm sure, emptying out the refrigerator & kitchen cabinets hoping that SOMETHING will appease them. There are days when I have to figure out what "deeez" means today? Yesterday it meant cheese. The day before it meant juice. Today it could mean cookies. Who the heck really knows?! Its frustrating for me as a mother trying to fulfill the needs of my children. I've been doing that since they were born & hoping to God that I'm doing a decent job. I'm sure I've failed a few times. But this time around the task is sometimes darn near impossible. The only thing I know for sure without a doubt is when they need a diaper change. Thank goodness for small accomplishments.

After giving this some thought I realized this communication thing is probably something they'll struggle with all their lives. I am certainly still dealing with communicating with those around me. The only thing that gives me some comfort is that I don't expect much from my almost-two-year-old -babies and many days it's easier to communicate with them then it is for me to communicate with many adults. Yup. There it is. I've said it & I strongly believe it's true. For instance communicating with a 36-year-old-man.....I say let's start cleaning up the house & he hears let's clean sometime next month or 60-year-old-grandmother....I say I'll call you when I'm on my way & she hears call me every 10 minutes until I get there. You see what I mean?

So I think my goal here is to teach my girls to be patient with me. Because heaven knows these girls are going to have a lifetime of communication challenges & they might as well start now at dealing with people who just don't LISTEN to you.

Dearest Cati & Val

I know this is a tough time girls. I know you are trying so hard to let mommy know what you want. I may not get it right all the time but I sure am trying my darnest to get you what you need. And sometimes, my sweet little peanuts, the answer is "no." I know, I know, this is not an easy word for you to accept but that's life. I know you would love to throw cheerios around in church & into some lady's pocketbook but mommy has to show you some limits and some common courtesies. Trust me, these lessons will go a long way in life for you both. And you should also know that you don't always know what's good for you & mommy does, most of the time. Sometimes you don't even know what you want because I'm pretty sure that you can't possibly want to see Dora The Explorer at 3:30AM. What you actually want is "sleep." I know this because that's what I want!

But don't worry girls, that's what I'm here for to guide you through these tough times & to prepare you for the future. I hope that I can prepare you for adult life when you have to communicate to the dirt bag that just broke your heart that he's just not worth your tears or heartache & he should definitely get lost. I hope I can teach how to speak kindly to your mother, who wants to spend every moment by your side to protect you from the world & let her know that it's okay to let go of your hand. I hope that I can prepare you for speaking intelligently & respectfully exactly what's on your mind & in your heart. I hope that one day you're not afraid to stand up for yourself or stand for what is right. I hope that I can teach you to be strong women unafraid to tell the world that you are a valuable & great person with so much to offer.